Daddy, why’s this sock in my drawer?

“Daddy, why’s this sock in my drawer”? I love it when they call me Daddy. I’ve learned more about the love of God and how it mediates His righteous anger in the few years since I became a dad than I did in the almost 40 years before. (Yep, I started late.) It’s not that I don’t get angry – and with cause. See, for example, my note about wanting to put them on e-Bay after they filled their room with beanbag pellets. But I took the picture of the room, all the while still very unhappy, to say the least, knowing that eventually love would overcome anger.

Isn’t that what God does for us? He picks us up out of our mess – that we’ve made – and He’s not always happy about it, I’m sure. But He picks us up, knowing His love will overcome His righteous anger and that He’ll clean up the mess, just like I did with the beanbag pellets.

I figure God likes being called “Abba Father” even more than we like saying it, as awesome as that is, for the same reason I love hearing silly, little questions like “Daddy, why’s this sock in my drawer?”

39 Years Later

Sometimes – often – I wake up in the early hours of the morning and can’t go back to sleep. I listen to music from the early 80s and for a moment it’s 1980, and I’m a college freshman again. I’m in my little shotgun apartment in Jacksonville with the cold tile floor. It is early in the morning. I’m sleeping on the same bed I had as a kid, and the sun is peeking through the thin drapes in my bedroom. My parents are asleep or just starting their day 100 miles away, but they and my grandparents will be in the stands on the 30- yard line near the concession stand on Saturday. And it is time for me to head to Southerners band camp or Mason Hall to practice – or more likely to philosophize on the bench outside of Jerkyl’s office. (Jerkyl was a nickname for Dr. Jerald Davis.) John is there. Jeff is there. Lisa is there.  For a split second we’re all there again. 

And then it passes as fast as the last 39 years have. 

The 80s music is still playing on an oldies station. But that split second when it was 1980 is over. This morning my father is far more than a hundred miles away. So is John. But, that’s ok. I know where they are. Mom is just down the street. My precious kids are down the hall asleep, and that’s very good. And it’s now. I enjoyed the visit and find myself in my melancholy 1980 from time to time. 

But today, here and now, is good. Life isn’t as simple maybe. But my world is rich. In a few hours my kiddos will be stirring. I’ll get my achy back out of bed and spend the day with young people exploring their 1980 for the first time or adult students building a better today for their families. I’ll spend the work hours with passionate colleagues and friends. I’ll see cousins by the dozens at Walmart. (That’s what happens when you live in your hometown.) And by the grace of God, I’ll return home to my kids and have Mom over for supper. I’ll still visit 1980, but even if I could – as sweet a memory as it is – I wouldn’t stay there and miss today.

Counting my Blessings

I’m sitting on my front porch and gently rocking in my porch swing. I should be grading papers, and I’ll get back to that shortly. But it is just so nice outside right now. It rained today and cooled things off. So it’s nice out here with the tree frogs and crickets serenading me. (Sorry, I waxed a bit sappy and poetic there.) Yeah, my front yard needs cutting, but it’s not that bad. I’ll get to it by the weekend. From here I can see the herb and flower garden in the front of the house. It’s looking good. It’s nice and green with a splash of colors from the flowers and has plenty of mulch, so it won’t require too much weeding as the summer progresses. I can see the new American flag I got over the Father’s Day weekend. It looks good hanging there, and if you’ll allow me a moment, I want to thank all the men and women, past and present, who served under it and who kept and continue to keep me safe to sit on my front porch.

Now, to some of my younger friends and students it might seem odd to celebrate sitting on a front porch swing. But in reality, there’s a lot of peace that comes along with owning a front porch and a swing to go on it. My kids are nearby playing and are safe and healthy. In fact, I just got back from the doctor today for a checkup for Nick. You know, they say that when you have your health, you have everything. Well, I think when you know your kids are safe and healthy, that’s actually closer to having everything.

Sure, I have problems; we all do. Some of you know mine more intimately than others. But I have many, many blessings more blessings than problems, and I should count them more often. One, two, three, there’s another one and another one… Seriously, there’s a lot of good and love in my life. I have lots of family and friends who love me, and thanks to modern technology and social media I get to trade messages with family and friends down the block or across the country or even on the other side of the globe. I really do have lots of things to be thankful for.

You know, I just thought of one more before I close. I have hair and Peter Frampton is bald! My apologies, Mr. Frampton, but have you guys seen him in those insurance commercials? For those too young to recall, the man had lots of hair “back in the day.” And now, well, not so much. Yes, I really do have lots to be thankful for.

Sometimes I wake up and can’t sleep.

Sometimes I wake up early and can’t sleep. I’m not so holy that I’m compelled to wake up early and pray. I just tend to have insomnia. So, this morning when I work up at 5 a.m., after having slept only about five hours, my mind began to ponder. I thought about the wet and the cold and that silly mimosa tree that had grown up into my neglected flower bed. I thought about one thing and then another. Finally, and I don’t know why, I began to think about Christ as he entered into the Heavenly Tabernacle and presented His own sinless blood on the Mercy Seat before God the Father.

So, let me say to my skeptical friends, yes, I believe this. What human priests did for centuries were merely, as scripture says, a shadow of what Christ finally did “once for all.” This said then, if Christ were “slain from the foundation of the world,” then the Mercy Seat in the Heavenly Tabernacle must have been prepared waiting for eons of eternity past. This raises a question in my sleepy mind: How many times “before iniquity was found” in him did Lucifer walk past it, not sure what it was or its purpose, since until man sinned there was probably not even a hint of its value.

I can imagine him in that time before time walking by, maybe wondering about it periodically, other times not even noticing it. But it was there. And in the Father’s mind, the true significance of it was clear and remained. Had Lucifer asked about it, maybe he could have been warned about his own future fall and possibly kept his pride in check. Probably not. Or, did he look at it and think what a useless piece of furniture God had put in such a prominent place and then question God’s wisdom, after all. More likely. And how often do we do the same thing?

Are there things that God has placed in our lives, maybe even before we were born, that make no sense to us and cause us to wonder at God’s wisdom, though we might not want to admit this to ourselves? Has God put things in MY life that I walk around daily and ignore or treat with contempt? The Heavenly Mercy Seat is one of a kind, placed in Heaven and prepared to receive Christ’s sacrifice “from the foundation of the earth.” Likewise, Lord, show me the unique things in my life that you have ordained but that I ignore or question. Help me not to rearrange the furniture or put in a yard sale those things that you have placed with a purpose. Please don’t let me walk around something for my whole life, thinking You’ve given something a prominent place needlessly. Forgive me my arrogance and help me to “humble [myself] under the mighty hand of God” and just leave the furniture where you’ve placed it and learn its value and purpose.

And now that I think about it, maybe my life-long insomnia could be there for a reason. Maybe I don’t fall asleep right off or wake up not because I’m so holy but because I’m not. Maybe I need to take advantage of the early hours of quiet, leave the TV off, and spend time with my Heavenly Father since His Son’s sacrifice has made it possible for me to cry out “Abba Father.” So that’s what that thing is for. I gotta go. I need to talk to my Father. Maybe there’s something else I’ve been ignoring that I need. In fact, I’m sure there is.

Precious Memories IN THE MORNING

Folks, sometimes life can, well, really suck. (Can I say that?) But for those times, I’ve learned to draw on my memories of better times. For example, I was trading emails with an old college buddy this week. We both marched in the Jacksonville State University Marching Southerners “back in the day.” (You may now be in awe that I was a member of such an auspicious group.) He and I agreed that good memories, especially those of special times in our lives, are a gift and resource from God to sustain us through tough times. In fact, I don’t think it’s wrong to equate this with God’s command to Israel to set up monuments of remembrance for themselves individually as well as nationally to call to mind His blessings of the past. He said more than once something like “when your children ask… tell them.” So, I show my children pictures on Facebook of the Marching Southerners and old college friends. I was truly blessed to be a part of this group and have lifelong friends because of it. And the memories are not just “glory days” reminiscences. Instead, they are reminders in tough times that there were blessings in my life and that there are promises for the future. Now, I’m not about to break into a refrain of “precious memories, how they linger…” But, I might just lean back sing “I’ll fly away IN THE MORNING!” (Sorry folks, inside joke for all my 5,000 plus Southerners alum buddies.)

So, if you’re in a tough place in life, think back over where you’ve been and the good things and family and friends that God has put in your life. And if life is pretty good at the moment, then get off of that silly computer and get out there, live, do something, and make some memories for the future!

Out of the Mouth of Babes

This is from several years ago when my kids were younger and I drove them to school daily. I miss those days, the laughter, and the lessons.

Scripture tells us that out of the mouth of babes comes perfected praise. This is related to the idea that out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks. I think this because babes just say whatever is in their hearts or minds, unfiltered, without reservation or self-editing. We mature adults, on the other hand, filter our prayers to make us sound better, forgetting that God looks on the heart more than He listens to the words. But, that’s a deep lesson for another day. Now, I’d also like to suggest that out of the mouth of babes God has perfected humor.

I pray with my children at night and everyday on the way to school. Some of the most beautiful and heart-felt prayers have come out of their mouths, which is one reason I like to hear them pray aloud. And sometimes they’re just plain funny, especially my son’s. A few weeks ago our Spanish and Portuguese speaking neighbors to the south along with the home of Calhoun and the seat of Southern rebellion were blessed. Nick was closing his prayer. He typically prays a very encompassing prayer. But he often has a unique twist on the God-bless-everyone approach. In his conclusion he prayed, “And God bless South America and South Carolina.” Today, he was even more encompassing in his prayer. Today, the solar system is blessed, in particular Venus and Mars, as he prayed God’s blessing on this corner of the cosmos. You can’t make this stuff up. You just have to enjoy it when it comes. So I smiled inside and said an amen to his prayer.

As a father, on one hand I want to direct him to focus his prayers and think about specific needs of others, as well as his own. But, on the other hand, you never know when out of the mouth of babes God has perfected praise, or in this case prayer, and just possibly the gravitational pull of one of our neighboring planets was intensified because of his prayer just enough to deflect a killer asteroid from a collision path with earth. I’m not out there in space. But God sees all and in His mysteries could have prompted the prayer to move something more than Dad’s face into a smile.

Jesus said not to forbid the little children from coming to Him. Moreover, we must become like a child to enter the Kingdom. Maybe it could be that as I try to focus my child’s prayer with my mature, adult thinking, instead I should listen and learn and expand my own narrow prayers. So, God bless Mars and Venus.

One for my Pocket

This is a memory from some years ago.

I was doing a little bit of laundry in the morning before anyone else got up. I couldn’t sleep and knew I needed some blue jeans for the day. As I was putting some of my things to wash, I grabbed a few pair of pants belonging to the kids. I learned long ago that many things go in pants pockets that don’t necessarily need to go in a washing machine. As I cleaned out the pockets of Olivia’s shorts, I found three individually wrapped Life Savers that she had taken from the candy bowl in my office.

My colleagues and I keep hard candy of various sorts on our desks at work. It’s there free for students or any other guests who come to the office. Most ask before taking a piece. Some don’t, realizing it’s there for them. My regulars, such as other faculty members or students who have taken a number of classes with me, will with ease lift a piece or two out of the bowl and crunch away as we talk, never hesitating to enjoy what has been freely provided for them. The candy is clearly out there for the taking as a gesture of hospitality.

My children have a different relationship with my candy bowl. I try to monitor their sugar intake because too much sugar is just not healthy. Also, if we’re passing through the office on the way to lunch or something, I don’t want them filling up on empty calories. So, they’ve learned to ask before taking candy from the bowl. But even though they have to ask, there is yet a different relationship that they have with the candy because of the relationship they have with me. That’s Daddy’s candy. And if it’s Daddy’s, then it’s potentially theirs in a different kind of way than it is for anyone else.

Here’s how the candy bowl rules developed. Early on they learned only one piece at a time was all I would allow them. Our exchange would go something like this.

“May I have some candy?”

“Yes, but only one.”

“Please…” and the pleading for additional sugar to rot their teeth would begin. Eventually, they figured out a subtler tactic.  

“Could I have one now and one for my pocket?”

I relented to this request. It became the pattern. They could have one now and one for their pocket, which sometimes turned out to be as many ones as their little pockets could hold. This is how the three pieces ended up in Olivia’s pocket.

I’ve said before I’ve learned more about God since I became a parent than in the years before. Here, too, I see my Heavenly Father. Several things come to mind.

If it’s His, it’s mine. But I do need to ask. He knows better what and when and how I need His blessings, but still I often have not because I ask not.

Second, I don’t have to take just one blessing from the bowl. I can take one, or many, for my pocket. For example, if it’s wisdom I need, James tells me God gives liberally. In fact, in many areas of our Christian walk God has a pocket full of blessings, but we fail to stuff our pockets.

Third, we need to check our spiritual pockets more often. As I said, I found three hard mints in Olivia’s pockets that morning. They were blessing from her Dad’s candy bowl, waiting to be eaten and enjoyed. But she had stuffed them in her little pocket and gone on with her day, forgetting about them at some point. Eventually they ended up in the laundry and in this little blurb.

I looked through my pockets that morning and discovered they were full and running over also. I counted so many wonderful blessings, including two precious kids who were still asleep just down the hall. That’s two pieces of candy right there. I have a Christian heritage of parents, grandparents, and even great-grandparents who poured themselves into me. I have a pastor and several mentors in the faith, including some who have now passed to their reward, who also have given of themselves for my spiritual sweet tooth. That’s a pocket full!! And the list could go on of friends and family and colleagues and sunshine and flowers and…. and of the Holy Spirit that will lead me and comfort me and assure me that all of the candy in the bowl is for me, and I have permission to take some for my pocket. I just need to remember to fill my pockets more often and enjoy the blessings He has so richly and freely provided.

Now if I could only find something spiritual about the dehydrated earthworm I found in Nick’s pocket.

Well, enjoy your day and check your pockets. You never know what goodies from God you’ve stuck there and forgotten about.

Is anything too hard for God – even if we laugh?

“Is anything too hard for the LORD? At the time appointed I will return unto thee, according to the time of life, and Sarah shall have a son. Then Sarah denied, saying, I laughed not; for she was afraid. And he said, Nay; but thou didst laugh” (Genesis 18:14-15).

Having been promised that in her old age she would have a child, Sarah had responded as most of us would. I know my own too-often lack of faith; I would have laughed, too. Once she was called and confronted with her laughter, fear followed doubt and she denied she had laughed. But God knew the truth and simply said, “Yes, you did laugh.” He didn’t grind her to powder or condemn her or anything other than let her know that HE KNEW.

Of course, before we condemn Sarah harshly, we should keep in mind that Abraham laughed, likewise, when he had been given the same promise sometime before (Genesis 17:17). Here, Abraham tried to reason out what God really meant or to figure out using earthly means what God had promised supernaturally. So Abraham pronounced a blessing on Ishmael, the son that he had fathered earlier with his servant when he and Sarah had tried to help God’s plan along. God, then, said He would, indeed, bless Ishmael for Abraham’s sake, but He also said He meant what He had said, that a child of promise through Sarah would be Abraham’s promise come true.

Is there a lesson here? Yes, many, but one comes to mind at the moment. It’s simple. God doesn’t need our help and can even work in the midst of doubt and even laughter at His plan. He can bring it to pass. And when He does, He’ll even name it for the doubt that challenged it. “Abraham was an hundred years old, when his son Isaac [laughter] was born unto him. And Sarah said, God hath made me to laugh, so that all that hear will laugh with me. And she said, Who would have said unto Abraham, that Sarah should have given children suck? for I have born him a son in his old age” (Genesis 21:5 – 7). Isaac – laughter – was the fulfillment of the promise. God has a sense of humor. Abraham and Sarah had laughed in doubt at the promise of God; then they laughed in joy at the fulfillment of the promise.

Hold on the promises, even if it seems they can’t happen – even if you have doubted and laughed at the prospect. (Been there, done that, got that T-shirt.) Now, God won’t let it slide. He’ll check you and say, “Yes, you did laugh.” But, He’s the one responsible for bringing the promise to fulfillment. He will. And when He does it will be clear He did it in His time and His own way. Then, laugh again at the promise fulfilled.

How religious can we be and still be sinful?

How religious can we be and still be sinful? Matthew 27:3 tells us that “When Judas, who had betrayed him, saw that Jesus was condemned, he was seized with remorse and returned the thirty silver coins to the chief priests and the elders.” The religious leaders were unconcerned with Judas’ admission of sin. They didn’t seek to restore him. In fact, they essentially told him that his sin was his problem. Throwing down the pieces of silver, he left and took his own life. Taking up the pieces of silver, the priests admitted the money had purchased a murder. But instead of concern over the sin that they had initiated, facilitated, and purchased with the money, they only saw the taint on the money, not on themselves. It was the money that was tainted, so it could not go into the Temple offering. They were concerned about the right religious practice, not righteousness. They somehow did not feel nor see that their evil deeds disqualified them from entering the temple more so than the money was disqualified as an offering for the Temple.

Lord, what religious observances do I follow while I neglect “the weightier matters of the law: justice and mercy and faith”? Forgive me and show me, so I can repent.

God works in mysterious ways…. that are as obvious as the nose on your face.

To me, one of the most sublime and understated passages in the Bible is Jonah 3:3: “This time Jonah obeyed the LORD’s command…” Jonah has been thrown overboard during a massive storm at sea, spent three days being digested alive in the belly of a fish, and has just been vomited up on the beach. God said, “Go” for the second time. OK, who wouldn’t obey “then”? I almost laugh when I read this passage. There’s a serious aspect as well since clearly God knows how to get the attention of His disobedient children, and yet the chapter reveals more than this about God’s ability to work with or in spite of us. Chapter 3 tells us that the people of Nineveh believed Jonah’s prophecy of destruction and repented and were spared. If we’re not careful, we’ll read right over this passage with a quick “praise the Lord” without realizing they mystery and intricacy of God’s working. Sure, the Word is sharp as a sword and surely pierced their hearts, but God knows how to set the stage for the greatest delivery and the greatest good. Consider the following.

First, Jonah has just experienced God’s judgment and then mercy firsthand. He knows judgment! He can speak to it with the passion of someone who has “been there and done that.” Fresh on his mind are the waves that crashed over him as he sank into the sea. Then, in his watery grave a living coffin in the form of a great fish engulfed him. Surely, he felt his deserved doom as the fish swallowed him. But he repented and the coffin became a lifeboat. God’s instrument of judgment turned into His vehicle of mercy and of Jonah’s salvation. Spat up on the shore of Nineveh, Jonah understood God’s great judgment but also His great mercy and surely preached this with the fervency of someone who had experienced both. Even if he wanted to hide this, I’m sure he couldn’t. Even if the spiritual understanding of his recent experience had not yet fully been formed in him, the psychological state of having lived through this trauma of his own making would have come through in his preaching. But it gets better.

Jonah’s spiritual and psychological condition would have surely infused his preaching with a passion he didn’t have before spending three days in the belly of the fish. But consider his physical condition as well; he must have been a mess. Now, I must give credit where credit is due. This idea is not original to me. Years ago I heard Christian comedian Mike Warnke discuss this. Mike has had his own issues since I heard his presentation, but his point is yet a valid one. What must Jonah have looked and smelled like after spending three days in the digestive system of a fish. Gastric fluids have bleached him white. His hair has been digested right off his head. And I just don’t think a quick bath on the beach got the smell of fish guts off him before he hit downtown Nineveh.

Picture this. A guy walks into your town, bleached white and smelling of fish guts, and says something like this. “Hey, I’m one of God’s Chosen People and His prophet. He did this to me because I disobeyed. Oh, and now you’re on His list. He’s gonna destroy you because of your sins.” If you had been there, you’d have to think that if God did this to one of His own, what will He do to me. Well, I don’t know about you, but I guarantee I’d repent! And in a hurry! So did Nineveh, from the lowliest servant on the street all the way to the king in his palace. And God forgave them and didn’t destroy them. Yes, God is mysterious, but if we pay attention when we read His Word we can see His mysteries unfold. No, God didn’t make Jonah disobey, but I personally think He used this to fulfill his plan. Of course, the rest of the story is that the very reason Jonah didn’t want to go to Nineveh is that he knew God was merciful and would forgive if Nineveh repented. Nineveh was Jonah’s enemy, and he wanted it destroyed. How ironic, then, that Jonah’s disobedience is the very thing that God might have used to bring about Nineveh’s salvation.

I take two things away from this story. First, even when they’re as obvious as the nose on your face, God’s ways are still mysterious. Consider this. He saved both his disobedient servant and a sinful city, oh, and a boatload of sailors in the process, and all in spite of everyone. Second, sometimes His ways are hilarious, too. “This time Jonah obeyed…” It’s still funny.