I have somewhat against thee.

2:1 Unto the angel of the church of Ephesus write; These things saith he that holdeth the seven stars in his right hand, who walketh in the midst of the seven golden candlesticks; 2 I know thy works, and thy labour, and thy patience, and how thou canst not bear them which are evil: and thou hast tried them which say they are apostles, and are not, and hast found them liars: 3 And hast borne, and hast patience, and for my name’s sake hast laboured, and hast not fainted. 4 Nevertheless I have somewhat against thee, because thou hast left thy first love. 5 Remember therefore from whence thou art fallen, and repent, and do the first works; or else I will come unto thee quickly, and will remove thy candlestick out of his place, except thou repent. (Rev 2:1-5, KJV)

I almost began with we, but I should speak only for myself and say I. So…

I can be guilty of doing all the right things, of being orthodox in my beliefs and correct in my values, of even being passionate about doing the right things and “contending for the faith,” but at the same time forget to be passionate, not just about my faith, but about the one who is the “Author and Finisher of my faith.”

Now, since I am passionate about truth, I acknowledge that this passage is addressed to a church, not just an individual believer, so I won’t address the warning of removing the candlestick, whether this can be applied to an individual’s salvation in the same way it can to a corporate body of believers. What I will say is that I am guilty and need to repent, to turn around, and draw closer to the one that has promised to in return draw close to me. Father, forgive me. Holy Spirit, teach me. Savior, help me walk with you daily, whether into battle or beside the still waters. I crave your fellowship. I love you, Lord, my first love.

I know that sometimes public declarations of private passion are saccharin or self-serving. Well, I’m running the risk because confession is good for the soul – my soul.